When children fight with their friends and you find them angry with each other and away from each other.
So it’s best not to rush over to the child and ask what happened, then after that break up the problems between the two.
Yes, often as parents of toddlers, we are often made worried when children are trapped in conflicts and arguments, in the end you will immediately solve the problem and break up the argument on the grounds that the children who are still so small cannot solve the problem themselves. Some even say that, let alone solve his own problems, to take care of himself children has not been able to.
But who said that? When children grow up, they are required to be able to solve their own problems, right? Well, that’s why there is nothing wrong if it is taught from an early age. Wouldn’t teaching from an early age be much more useful than when they were grown up? For this reason, when you see that children already have the ability to think and channel their desires, there is nothing wrong with training and helping them to solve their own problems.
When you are wise enough to solve the problem yourself, you will certainly feel good. Not only that, your child will also learn various things such as how to stay calm, think rationally when there are problems and can even be a “referee” when facing friends arguing. Thus, when children are equipped with this ability, it will be calmer for you to release them in the environment around them, especially their playing environment.
For this reason, when you fight with his friends, don’t rush over to the child and judge him. Not always this fight has a bad effect, on the contrary, it can be used as an opportunity for children to learn how to solve their own problems. It’s just that, your supervision of the children certainly shouldn’t be careless, especially when the child starts to look heated. You need to be a bridge for your toddler from time to time so that they can direct their frustration into a peace which is hoped that over time the child’s ability to solve problems can get better.
Children who are equipped with the ability to solve problems when they grow up will naturally create a calm, more patient attitude and make them easily accepted by their environment. In addition, children with this ability will grow up to be modest people who do not like to approach the source of problems and problems.
Children who have the ability to solve problems will certainly grow to be more independent individuals, which of course this will make you feel happy to have such children right? For that, let’s help and support children learning to solve their own problems.
1. Help Children Identify the Problem
An important first step to give your child is to help the child identify the problem on his own. This is an important thing that needs to be done first, knowing the real problem you will be able to help the child to determine what he can do next. For example, when a child is fighting with a friend, ask the child to sit patiently and ask what problem really happened, if the problem was triggered by a misunderstanding, then you can ask the child to come back with his friends and play together again.
2. Try not to interfere
When a child intervenes in a fight between his friends. So, try to respect the opinion of the child and give them the confidence that he will be able to find a solution. Give your child time to intervene. Although not infrequently this will make him run and ask adults for help to be able to resolve conflicts, but still provide space and trust.
When you come up to you to ask for help mediating his friend’s argument, try asking him a few questions. In this way, children will generally be able to accept the solutions proposed by adults. “If your mother said, instead of you fighting because you want to be in a group, it’s better to play together, dear.”
3. Help Your Toddler Have Empathy
Children aged 3-4 years have started to show empathy for others. So, don’t be surprised when he sees a cat or his friend being hurt, he cries or gets upset. However, sometimes his egocentric nature still appears in the child. So, to hone the child’s ability to recognize other people’s feelings, then invite your toddler to recognize body language and expressions raised by friends. From here, children will be able to avoid and determine their actions towards other people so that problems can be avoided.
4. Sharpen the Abilities of the Toddler
Sharpen your toddler’s ability to be able to sort and select situations by asking a question. This is of course done to find out what happened and avoid arguments with the child that would trigger problems. For example, ask what happened, why the problem occurred and so on.
Well, if your toddler is still having difficulty finding solutions to solve problems, then give them a choice of solutions. For example, ask if your child wants to take turns asking his friend or ask for another game that can be done together. In addition, also ask the reason why your child chose this method.
5. Solve Problems by Getting Your Toddler to Talk
Give insights to your toddler on how to solve good problems. There is no need for physical aggression such as hitting, pinching or even biting. Problem solving can be done through dialogue.
This method may sound difficult for toddlers, but toddlers will be able to choose a solution for this solution if there is support from parents. You also need to be able to give them an example of how to deal with conflict well.
Give examples to children about how to control attitudes. You can also solve problems involving your toddler by bringing them along and inviting them to discuss. It is hoped that this method can be imitated by the toddler and absorbed and then he can apply it in real life.
Even though they are still small and growing in the bodies of toddlers, it does not mean that children do not have the ability to solve problems on their own. As long as there is effort and assistance and encouragement from parents to do so, then slowly but surely the toddler will learn how to resolve a conflict. It is true that the results achieved will not be perfect, but it is the process that must be judged not the end result. Those are some of the methods above, hopefully they can be a guide and reference for you.