Unfortunately, sometimes the views of life and opinions that children have are not always the same as our views of life. This is also what sometimes causes children in their teens often have difficult times with their parents, especially when you and your child have different opinions and views.
There are many ways for your child to have the same opinion as you, or to carry out the advice you give them, but in practice these are not always easy to implement. Sometimes children’s opinions are accompanied by a high ego that always wants to be heard, this often makes their opinions stronger than ours.
This may be natural, because at the age of adolescence, children who interact with their surroundings have received other influences that also affect their thinking patterns. It’s just that, ironically, when they make decisions that are against your parents, this often triggers the issue of your debate with them. These decisions can be related to lifestyle, choosing school majors, to marriage issues. So what should you do when you face this problem?
Here are some wise tips you can do.
1. Know the cause in advance
When a child has a decision that is contra or not in accordance with you, before arguing or scolding him, it is better to know in advance what the reasons behind the child made the decision. The source may not come from the children themselves. For that, first investigate what the reason is, by taking the time to talk seriously with emotions that are still under control. Ask the children exactly why they made this decision and what they hoped to do after the decision was made. After the child’s opinion has been conveyed, then you can examine and consider whether the decision is beneficial for him or even detrimental to him.
2. Convey Your Opinions Wisely
If you find that the decision made by the child is not right or even does not benefit him, do not suddenly reject the child’s decision and then scold him. Most children get angry easily if they are forbidden without any clear reason from their parents. For that, before giving a decision “no” to prohibit it. It is better to express your opinion why you rejected the decision they made. In addition, you can also provide other decisions that are much better than the decisions the child is going to make. That way, in addition to getting an explanation, children can also consider the decisions you suggest with the decisions they want to make.
3. Asking the Child to Think Back to it
The emotions of children in adolescence are sometimes very unstable. The decisions they make are sometimes taken because of a moment’s emotion and they don’t realize it. For that, to be wiser, ask them to think back over the decisions they made. Ask the children to list the positive and negative impacts if they make this decision. If the results are more negative, without explaining to them, the child will understand more and reconsider the decision.
The debate between children and parents is often ignited for trivial matters. If you do not agree with the decisions made by the child, do not be quick to forbid and scold him. Give an explanation first and convey your opinion wisely, ask them to rethink the decision and ask him to list the positive and negative impacts when they made the decision. That way, children will be able to reconsider the decisions they made.